overcome – Page 4 – Khaos Theory Derby

A Girl on her Path to Awesome

I fully and readily admit that patience has not always been my strong suit.

I have always been one to rush into decisions. I liked to call myself ‘spontaneous’ when I was younger, but now I see that it was purely rash decision making. Not all of these rash decisions ended up yielding negative results (I certainly wouldn’t be who I am today if it weren’t for rash decisions). Moving in with my brother, going to HACC for theatre, going BACK to HACC for Humanities years later and joining roller derby were all split second decisions. So was auditioning for “There Goes the Bride”. So was starting Herbalife. So was deciding to be a coach. So was both years of Rollercon.

An example of a positive result from a rash decision... Warren and I — An example of a positive result from a rash decision… Warren and I

That being said, a lot of rash decisions have not yielded such amazing friends and positive results. But “That’s ok,” I’ve always told myself, “They will eventually. I’m on my path to awesomeness.”

So funny thing about that. I’m listening to the audiobook now Start: Punch Fear in the Face, Escape Average and Do Work that Matters by Jon Acuff. (What can I say, the title caught my eye and his writing and narration style is reminiscent of my own so the messages are hitting home really strong)

Seriously. Buy it or download it. Amazing personal development.

In the book he talks about the Path to Awesome. How we’re all on our own Path and how if we don’t look around and take an honest appraisal of where we’re at now and again, then we may not realize that we’re actually on the Path to Average by accident. I have always said that I don’t want to just wait for my turn to die. I continue to hold that belief.

I have recently begun seeking full time employment to compliment my Herbalife business. Let me be clear: I am not putting a halt to my health coaching. I love it, it’s my passion and I feel like my genius lies within the realm of my coaches and clients. That being said, college, relationships and 10 years of minimum wage jobs and botched rash decisions have left me in a hole (ok, a crater really).

I have been bad at being patient.

I did not want to recognize as I graduated that I needed more time to develop my business. I needed more time to become a good coach. I needed more time to understand how to expand my client list simply and locally. I do not regret a single coaching gig. Oh no way! This summer was an amazing ride – full of hills and valleys and corkscrews (actually and figuratively). I have formed strong friendships thanks to my rash decisions of the last few months. Now is the time to change it up, however. I didn’t want to admit that I needed time to become strong at skills and at jobs. I didn’t want to waste time, and in the process I did NOTHING but waste time.

Oh wait, I guess I should mention one more rash decision: I’m moving to Baltimore.

An exact date has not been set, but in order to walk the Path to Awesome I know I need to move. I’ve been saying for the last 2 years that when I graduated I would be moving out of Central PA. I knew that I needed to – I just didn’t know where to go. Well, I know now. I have been applying for full time jobs both in Lititz and in Baltimore. So we’ll see which ones call me first.

Some places I’ve applied to: Baltimore Convention Center, Baltimore Aquarium, Discovery Channel, Honest Tea, Baltimore Sun, Charm City Cakes, Merritt Athletic Clubs, Sheetz, Jimmy John’s and Heavy Seas Alehouse. I’ll be honest, these are just the names that pop into my head. I’ve been sending out 2 to 10 applications a day for at least 5 days. (One of them has to at least interview me, right?)

So here’s the plan for my Path: continue to build an online community and support system for athletes to become HARDERBETTERFASTERSTRONGER. Continue to build up my team of amazing coaches and show them they are awesome and strong and have everything inside them to be successful. Work a full time job for a while to pay down my bills and put some stuff into savings. Move to Baltimore and work with a local club to begin building a local community of clients and coaches. When I hit GET team, I will be able to afford all of my bills, savings, taxes, travel and extras enough to leave whatever job I had been at.

If it takes one year, awesome. If it takes three years, that’s ok too. This patience thing is where I will learn the skills and learn how to edit and learn how to master all things coaching and health. The patience will hopefully spill over to my personal life, where I have had a habit of expecting things to come along quicker than they should.

And derby. Derby will still happen. I go to see a Physical Therapist tomorrow to get my knee and IT band looked at. If they tell me that I need to take time off, than that is what I will do [though maybe not starting tomorrow]. I am also putting in a bid to help out the Harm City Homicide as a coach. I have found a passion for men’s derby this year, and I want to help my southern boys be strong and fast.

Here’s really the big key: to the outside world nothing will look different. I will continue my Shred Challenges. I will continue my Instagram and WordPress accounts. I’ll be that person once more that people say, “How do you do it all?”

And my answer will be: “Have you ever heard of Herbalife?”

Derbalife is everywhere.

For more information on getting healthy or becoming a coach, drop me a line at KGreyActiveNutrition@gmail.com

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Fancy Football Footwork – Merry Khaos Notes

Here is another class that I revisited at BEAT ME HALFWAY 2014! I’m just going to revamp this blog to incorporate some of the new, fun stuff we did at BMH. We didn’t have the space we did during RollerCon, so we couldn’t do as many of the fun routes.

This was my most popular class .. probably because it was offered the most out of all of them! Here is a run down of what we did (mostly), and explanation of the trickier named things on the list, and drawings of the ladders and routes. E-mail me at DerbyAmerica@yahoo.com if you need further explanations!

For everything – focus on derby position, sharpness and PRECISION. It is better to do it slow, low and precise than sloppy, high and fast.

Warm Up
“Jump Rope” (basic, feet back/forth, feet in/out) – each for a minute
Squat Jumps

Walk these across a space:
Lunge & Stretch – As you lunge, bring the elbow of the side that is forward down to the floor next to that foot (right leg is forward, right elbow comes to match it), look up at the ceiling, hold for a second and come up.
Side Lunge – You will move to your right, bringing your left leg behind your right and touching your knee to the floor in a ‘lunge’. Stand back up, and now bring your left leg in front of your right to complete the lunge. You should do this both directions.
Monster Walk – Keep your body tight. Flex your feet and bring your right leg to a 90 degree angle with your body. This should be slow, controlled and precise. This is NOT a high kick. This is not fast. Bring your foot back down slow and controlled. You should have only traveled one length of your own foot.

Feet Warm Up:
Shuffle Step
Grapvine (hips square)
Back Pedal
Quick Feet (feet shoulder length)
Quick feet (wide stance)

Quick feet = lowering yourself into derby position, and jack hammering your feet into the floor. When in the short stance, you should be on your toes. When in the wide stance, you should be on your heels.

Ladders
The goal is to hit both feet on each step to increase the difficulty. It’s better to add an extra step in rather than trip up your brain. Also, if you lead with one foot the first time through, try to lead with the other foot on the second.

Yes, the orange is in the push-up position. Scoot up the ladder by moving your hand and foot at the same time to gain momentum. Keep that butt down!!

Routes
Use routes to develop quick twitch and explosion. Incorporate side-stepping, loops, spins, back pedal, quick cuts and full stops. Use cones to develop routes. You can even incorporate football more by making the skaters catch something at certain points in the routes. This will not only force them to keep their eyes up, but will increase their awareness for the world around them.

Use cones to denote places of action, they are quick and ease to move around into new patterns. Also, linking patterns makes for a harder workout. Set up three patterns in a row and have your people move through them by jogging from the end of one to the beginning of the next.

Once you get a feeling for how patterns work and how to incorporate motion into them, it’s just a matter of making things up for you to do. You want to do routes a minimum of twice. Up to 5 times for maximum burst work. Stay low. Do everything sharp and precise. When you say stop, STOP DEAD and QUICK. Burst back out of it. Work on making some patterns very tight, and some longer to get a variety of speed adjustments.

Don’t be afraid to add some hand-eye coordination. You can have one person in the middle throwing a ball at people at different points of the routes, or even the next person in line will throw the ball to the person doing the run currently.

Box Drills
Set up your cones in a square. Now pick some different routes to run! Some ideas…
– Shuffle left, sprint up, shuffle right, back pedal
– Spin at each cone, hit each cone twice
– Sprint to each cone, use your feet to ‘circle the top’ of the cone, like you would if you were playing soccer and faking out the opposition

Some things to think about again is keeping low, keeping tight, and being PRECISE! Don’t let your hips swing, keep them square as you move through any box or route drill. Stay low, loading your legs with power, and keep your eyes up, and be quick and tight with every motion. Going onto YouTube and watching football (and futbal) players doing box and footwork drills will really help you understand how to stay in the “box” of yoru own shoulders and keeping your weight centered and strong.

Don’t be shy about checking out my other blogs too. Some that might be of interest to you:

Shifting Perspective (a blog about changing the way we look at training for derby)
Building You as a Better Skater
Eating Healthy Even When You’re Not at Home

And message me at DerbyAmerica@gmail.com if there’s a topic you would like me to cover in the future. I’m available for roller derby coaching and clinics! Drop me a line to get rates and to set up something with your league.

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New Shred Challenge Just Started!!

New Shred Challenge kicks off on Monday, August 5th!! $27 to register!!

– challenge ends monday, 9/12
– 2 winners best before & after
– 2 male & 2 female
– win cash money!! last challenge 4 winners won $225 EACH!!!!! cash pot was at $1,000!!!!!
– private FB Group page for support & inspiration
– $100 bonus challenge to person with most points by end of challenge. Or split if its a tie. Could be anyone! Bonus challenges are meant to inspire & encourage you to be more active
– earn 5 points/person towards the bonus challenge if you get a NEW person to do the challenge with you. They could not have been someone that was already in the past challenge we did! Goal is to go beyond $1000 cash pot!!
– weekly nutrition & fitness topics, recipes, etc.
– MUST be on an herbalife nutrition program. this is an herbalife challenge! what do you have to lose to be on a program for 6wks??? CAUTION – RESULTS may happen!
– anyone in any city/state can participate. We had people from the east coast, canada, hawaii, etc that participated last month!!!

How 2 register:
– Send registration to sheila via www.paypal.com to kilaro34@yahoo.com. In NOTES section, put your name, phone, email, coach/person that invited you! Then forward/email your receipt to your coach/mentor/person so they can add you to the FB Group page.
– email your front, side view pic in daylight lighting in a picture collage form with the date to sheila.healthandfitness@gmail.com

Congrats to our last challenge winners:

FEMALES: $225 each
Kristen Adolfi
Calyn Dannenberg

MALES: $225 each
Matt Whittaker
Eric Pattillo

Bonus Challenge Winners; $50 each
Theresa Miller
Eric Pattillo

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Atlantic Coast Derbalife Domination: Week 2!

Well, I’m on day #14. Officially 2 weeks of travel, training, coaching, vending and derby. There have been ups and downs, it’s absolutely true. It looks like my time in New England is going to come to an end quicker than anticipated, so Friday or Saturday I will be heading back to the New Jersey/Philadelphia area. (So if your team practices Friday and you’re looking for a guest coach let me know!)

This last 7 days have been pretty intense. What has really helped is having a home base since Saturday. MikeOpathic and Wife-Opathic have been amazing hosts for me. They have the comfiest couch I’ve ever slept on and have been gracious enough to let me put my Herbalife on their counter and a few of my beers in their fridge. Their cat, Socks, looks like my Wesley and has the temper of Abbey, but it’s ok.

I’ve gotten to do 2 outdoor skates (one with the Opathics and a 30 mile adventure with another Viking, Jack Hammer’d), I’ve coached three leagues (Mass Attack, Worcester and Bay State) and tonight I’m going to a co-ed scrimmage hosted by Mass Maelstrom.

The struggle this week has been to balance my eating with not being at home, my work with an unusual schedule and my knee after it popped during a demo at Mass Attack.

I will say this however: when my injury first started occurring and my knee would ‘pop’. I would be down and out for 2 weeks. Now, it pops and I’m back up in 10 minutes. Seriously. I ungeared at Mass Attack and by the time I was done taking my stuff off, I could put full weight on it. The next day I could straighten it completely. The day after that I had full range of motion again. Is it tender? Yea. But no more than it was before it popped.

Worcester Roller Derby are doing good stuff — Mass Attack Roller Derby are doing good stuff

Hell yes, good nutrition. While my first week on the road was not stellar for my protein count and vitamin intake, I have been really strict with myself this week. Vitamins and Herbalifeline, a shake a day minimum, at least 100g of protein and plenty of water. Boom. Injuries cannot stand in my way!!!

On the Derbalife front, I am trying to get the men of derby to pay attention, but getting them on my side is difficult. I believe it may simply be because they think I cannot possibly know what they need – since I’m a lady. So, I’m taking a new approach at Men’s Derby …

Hey men on wheels! Let me replace products you use already with the Herbalife equivalent for one month. See if you’re into what we have to offer. Whether it’s a pre-workout, post-workout, your Monster, your Gatorade, your Clif Bars or your vitamins: I have something for you. What have you got to lose?

Getting amped up for Rollercon too. A lot of details are still up in the air, but I am optimistic as always! Also, I will be heading to the Mohawk Valley Cup in a few weeks as a vendor for a men’s derby tournament.

Finally…. It’s happening folks. Team Rogue will ride again!! We are going to be playing the Penn Jersey Hooligans on September 29^th on the bank track. It’s a double header that night, and guess what else is amazing? I get to play both bouts. I will be making my debut on the PA All-Star team that night as we take on the Penn Jersey She Devils. It’s going to be wicked. If you are anywhere near Philly, you have got to come to this!

Finally … if you are a Derbalife athlete with a health result or a before/after picture, we at Derbalife want you to be a part of our revamped website! Have you stopped using your inhaler? Cut down your lap time? Lost weight? Gained weight? Become the top jammer? Become the strongest blocker? Send Derbalife@gmail.com your story, derby name, league and who your coach is. Also include a photo of you (or a before/after if you have it!). We need testimonials from Derbalife Coaches as well!

If you are a Derbalife athlete going to a Divisional tournament, mention that in your message – we have swag for our tournament skaters. E-mail Derbalife@gmail.com with your name, league, which divisional and who your Derbalife coach is to reserve your swag.

Phew. That was a much longer update than intended. I hope you all are enjoying my updates. I may do another entry later on tonight or tomorrow. For now… Happy skating!!

At CrossFit Collective doin' work — At CrossFit Collective doin’ work

If you are interested in getting hooked up with Derbalife, or if your league is looking for a Derbalife Boot Camp opportunity, drop me a line at DerbyAmerica@yahoo.com!

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Mental limits and real joy

I’m not going to lie: ECDX was a challenge for me.

I have this habit of putting really high standards on myself, and putting too much pressure on myself to perform. Then, when the team needs me in a different capacity than expected or something happens to change the way the game goes (compared to what I envisioned), I become stressed. I beat myself up. I make it harder to compete at that high level I hold for myself.

The whole cycle can get utterly ridiculous.

We all play a mental game when we step onto our track. How we perform depends on a myriad of outside forces not limited to how much sleep we got the night before, if our trucks feel tighter than normal, if we’re unsure what wheels to use and even who may or may not be watching us in the crowd.

The ability to shut off the receptors to the outside world is the first step to mental game dominance. Figuring out a bout day routine that you can take anywhere will help you prepare for the challenges ahead. So many of us create routines that rely on the comfort of a home bout; you need to be able to perform your warm-up (mental and physical) in any arena, at any time of day.

You are not preparing for an opponent. You are preparing to overcome your own physical limitations and to play the best game of your life. Preparing mentally takes just as much practice as preparing physically. Many of us ask the question, “How do we play a better mental game?” But few of us consider the repetition involved with developing it.

Mastering your mind, creating preparation routines to set yourself in the right frame of the game and then stepping into each jam with clarity and confidence – that is what we aim to do. This game is supposed to be fun. The physical nature, the mental challenge and the constant motion of the game is what every derby skater craves. Doing it to your highest limit, and even surpassing what you thought was possible – that is what we strive to achieve. Overcoming our own internal limits to accomplish a physical feat is what we all train daily for.

So now back to the self-destruction.

Stepping on the track tired, dehydrated, irritated, without proper mental prep, worried about an injury, etc etc etc will cause you to spiral out of control. Create triggers in your head right now so that if those things are happening to you as the game approaches, you can stop, reset and re-invent your mindset.

At first, you may need a team mate to snap you out of it. When that moment of realization of game day-crankiness occurs, stop. Acknowledge. Think about how you feel. That way [if there is] the next time, your own internal alarm will trigger and you can get your mindset right before disrupting your own gameplay or (worse) the mood of your team mates.

This is my challenge: understanding that I am better than I believe, that I can do more than I think and that I am quicker than my opponents. My challenge is to not be concerned that a motion is going to hurt me, and that I am going to break the pack. My challenge is to always have a smile on my face, even if I don’t play as much as I want to; even if my team needs me in a different capacity than I want to play. This is why ECDX was tough for me. I did not have my mental game in order. I did not go through my routine and I did not understand that I wasn’t going up against an opponent.

My challenge is to go up against myself, play to my limits and savor the joy of that 25 point jam with the team that loves and supports me as much as I love and support them.

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The difference a year makes

It’s amazing how the entire course of your life can change in a year.

Last summer, ECDX was a week earlier (ECDX, for those not in the know, is EAST COAST EXTRAVAGANZA – 3 days of roller derby hosted by the tenacious Philly Roller Girls). So let’s rewind one year and one week…

I knew I had one more year of school left. I was preparing for a Team USA boot camp and 2 WFTDA bouts with Harrisburg Area Roller Derby. I was writing for my Examiner semi-steadily and I had picked up a job at a local pizzeria for cash, and was still working for a fruit farm at a Thursday Farmer’s Market. Matt and I were doing well and we were looking forward to a Florida vacation later in the summer.

I earned MVP of Providence, but it was one of the toughest games I've ever played! — I earned MVP of Providence, but it was one of the toughest games I’ve ever played!

I was unhappy with my skating; I wasn’t completely unsatisfied, but I knew I could be better. I had done moderately well against Dominion and had earned MVP against Providence (which was huge for me*). However I was full of doubt. My quick endurance and strength wasn’t where I wanted it. My footwork was improving but clunky. I never had energy at the end of a jam and I was ALWAYS sore. I thought I was doing everything right, and I was just on the biggest plateau ever. When I looked at it – my body hadn’t changed in nearly TWO YEARS. Annoying.

Team USA boot camp Thursday. 3 Hour black and white scrimmage Friday. Sore. Spent. I met so many skaters that made me want to be better than I was (thank you, Gunder N Lightening, Fifi Nomenon and the ladies of the Columbia Quad Squad).

Then I meet Krissy Krash at her Derbalife booth. I’ve talked about this before so I’ll just fast forward.

One year and one week later, I am different.

Coming into a Cape Fear pack (photo by Juan Paden)

Not only is my body completely different, but my mind, attitude, outlook and future have shifted so drastically. I’ve been through a major injury. A break-up. A career change. A graduation. A sponsorship. I’ve played new rule sets, played a bank track tournament and am now pushing myself with the challenge of skate parks. I consider myself a runner now. And I’ve been back to rock climbing.

Today, still write, but I do it for my blog as well as Examiner as well as for a book. Now I am in a house in Lititz, shared by myself and two friends. My diet is high performance to match the intensity of my roller derby and Crossfit schedule. I’m a successful Herbalife coach with a HUGE vision of creating online support communities, pockets of local derby support and a series of training centers up and down the east coast. I talk to people from all over the world on a daily basis, and I have skaters contacting me and telling me what an inspiration I am to them.

The Pivot Center in Virginia is one of the training centers I'm so excited to be working with! — The Pivot Center in Virginia is one of the training centers I’m so excited to be working with!

I run boot camps and guest coach fairly regularly. I have people now seeking ME out. I am building my classes for Rollercon since this year I am teaching business classes, off skates workouts and on skates fundamentals.

I no longer have the limiting beliefs that I had at this time last year. I prepare for ECDX with my new team: the Dutchland All Stars. Instead of a Team USA Boot Camp, I will be going to a Team USA tryout. Last night at practice, I was able to not only keep up, but perform consistently throughout practice in a rink with no AC, no air flow and after having done a Crossfit open class an hour and a half before.

I no longer believe that I’m defective. That I’m unworthy of love and that I’ll never be ‘good enough’ for a man to want more than my body. Though, I’m pretty proud of that body, let’s be real. *winks*

I am strong. I am determined. I am a force. Despite the struggles. Despite the hardships of the moment, they will not define me. They do not define me. Not anymore. I am stronger than my struggles. I am the one who will be victorious in the end.

I don’t need a diamond – I am one.

If this is where I’m at this year – almost one year into being an Herbalife Health Coach, almost one year into being a Dutchland Roller … who knows where I will be at this time in 2014. I’m excited to find out.

If you have a big vision for your life, and think this whole Health Coach deal sounds as awesome as I thought .. drop me a line at KGreyActiveNutrition@gmail.com

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Drink the Kool Aid

For a few years now I have heard of this phenomenon called “CrossFit”. I was first introduced to the concept when the Black Rose Rollers (in … their second season perhaps?) struck a sponsorship deal with their local gym and begin training.

I’ll admit – I was instantly jealous.

I would see photos of my friends dead lifting and squat pressing alongside a guide and I wanted in. I didn’t care how. There was a piece of me that knew then that I needed to be a part of the movement.

But I wasn’t. I continued on doing my own thing. Slowly, more and more of my friends and derby-colleagues began partaking in CrossFit. People became obsessed with it; outsiders called them crazy. I understood the obsession – I have been skating for 4 years for a reason. From the outside I look crazed and obsessed. From the inside: how could you not be a part of this world?

Then, with any popular craze, the haters came in.

“It’s dangerous.” “You’ll ruin your body.” “They’re all about speed, not about form.”

And there was a part of me that believed them. I knew that there were competitions for CrossFit, and I heard so many negative comments about speed vs form, that I just started to believe them. It didn’t dull my desire to do CrossFit, but it just made me leery.

Then my team mate, the undeniably strong Russian Bayou, began her sessions. I asked her about it a lot (hopefully not too much); I was just so curious to know what it was about. How was it with her knee? Do they work with you? Is it all speed?

((There are times where I wonder if Bayou just wants me to stop talking to her because I get super excited (like a small yappy dog) and just ask questions.)) Through Bayou, and other league mate’s interest in her training and advancement, Dutchland was able to land a sponsorship with our local CrossFit: CrossFit Collective.

YEEEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSS

My meniscus is pinched.

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Ok, fast forward. This week I went to my first two sessions of CrossFit. Friends across the country were stoked that I was finally going to “drink the kool aid”. I was finally going to see why they love it.

Yea. I totally get it.

"Portrait of the day after CrossFit" — “Portrait of the day after CrossFit”

This isn’t a gym where you walk in and are left to your own devices to sweat or not sweat as you please. This is a place to advance. To push past every boundary your mind has ever set for itself. It is a place to make the weak, strong; and to make the strong, invincible.

The speed aspect? Some of the workouts have time limits. So in my first session, we had a superset of 1) Farmer’s Carries 2) 6 burpies and then 3) 6 wall balls from the side, both sides. So you would do 1, 2, 3 in succession. The goals was to do 5 rounds of them OR you stop when 10 minutes hits. With 80 pounds for my farmer’s carries and a 10 pound medicine ball, I was able to do the 5 sets in just under 9 minutes.

Not bad for my first day.

We used the bar and we got to experience the cardio/plyo/weight training of my dreams.

Now today … we did dead lifts. Ok, I got that. Jesse Blames taught me awesome form. (THANK YOU, JESSE BLAMES!!! ALL THE KNOWLEDGE FROM YOUR SESSIONS HAS BEEN INVALUABLE!!) Then we went outside.

Sled pushes. Tire flips. Teams.

Me and Jocie, Incollision and Tot Annie were pairs on the same team. As we flipped, they pushed. Each pair had to push the sled to the end of the lot and back 4 times; as they pushed the sled, we were to flip the tire. There was grunting, groaning, dirt, swearing, crying and a nearly dehydrated team member. We completed the 8 laps in 21:20. Our group did a total of 154. Jocie and I did about 110 on our own. My fingers haven’t hurt like this since my climbing days. My biceps have NEVER hurt like this before.

Congrats to all the ladies that finished!! Two (Nelly Hurtado and White Winged Shove) are even skating tonight in bouts!!

So there you have it. CrossFit. Do it. It’s a mental game. It’s great to do it with people for the encouragement. Jocie definitely helped me push through and overcome the mental game.

I’m so sore.

When can I go back?

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A Bit of the Spring and the Roll

So I just realized that it’s been 20 days since I posted. INCONCIEVABLE! So here I am. My brain is at a point where it feels like it should be doing work, but it’s been DOING work all day and has run out of what it can do with real precision and effectiveness.

I have blogs to write and articles about Spring Roll that I have wanted to put up, and now the Northeast Derby Convention. They will come in a fuller form tomorrow or Friday however. I’m still waiting for more pictures… Nothing worse than a blog with no pictures.

So here is the brief rundown of what’s been going on in life, the universe and everything: both a lot and not much at all.

Roller derby, Herbalife and my future have been taking up all of my brain space. I am working on moving out of the place I am in now to a spot in Lititz (closer to Lancaster than I am now). The move is a new chapter in life: The closing of doors and the opening of others. I have been both extremely confused as well as supremely invigorated in the past few weeks.

Spring Roll was a hell of an experience.

I played a few of the hardest games of my life within a 48 hour period. Not only that, but I had a few revelations about how much pressure I put on myself in derby… how many assumptions I had made about my teammates that weren’t true. They didn’t NEED me to be anything. They just need me to play and to work hard. What happens from there, happens. A lot of tears and insecurities came out after my bout against the Chicago Outfit (who were awesome, btw).

CONFIDENCE ON SUNDAY. Copyright 2013 by Bob Dunnell. Please do not remove watermarks from this photo. To purchase prints of this photo, please visit the following link: http://store.mrmcwheely.com/p41986587/e60cd2f99 — CONFIDENCE ON SUNDAY.
Copyright 2013 by Bob Dunnell. Please do not remove watermarks from this photo.
To purchase prints of this photo, please visit the following link:
http://store.mrmcwheely.com/p41986587/e60cd2f99

By Sunday morning, my entire outlook was changed around. Confidence in my feet, my team and MYSELF really came out. I not only was able to accept, but also understand that no matter how much you may want something – sometimes relationship issues cannot be resolved. Sometimes, you can’t just say you’re walking away. You have to.

Not only did I play two games (better than I thought against two teams that were tougher than I imagined), but Sunday was where the friendships took shape. I had scouted out a bunch of the juniors and men’s teams on Friday and Saturday, but it was Sunday that I can say that I bonded with people. Doing push-ups with the Carolina Wreckingballs in my sports bra and Skinz for the Mass Maelstrom was one of the highlights. I’m hoping no one got a picture of it though – I was drenched after my game against Arch Rival and my abs are not exactly photo ready yet!

BOOM. Photo by Kimmy Kempf — BOOM.
Photo by Kimmy Kempf

Magic City v Harm! Photo by Mr McWheely — Magic City v Harm!
Photo by Mr McWheely

Getting to follow up those friendships the next weekend at Northeast DerbyCon was fantastic. Dutchland wasn’t able to stay for any of the crazy Spring Roll after-parties so it was nice to share a few pints with folks in Providence and relax a bit.

I will do a separate blog about the COMPLETE AMOUNT OF AWESOME at the convention tomorrow.

For now, I prepare for bed. I have upped my training. I have refocused my nutrition. Yes, again. Tomorrow I’ll try CrossFit for the first time. I’ve got deliveries of Herbalife goodies and I have to stop by 717 Tattoo to talk to a piercer about getting on a plan.

I do love what I do. I do love the life that I’m carving out for myself. Things can be rough sometimes, and I can be unsure of what is coming next, but I know that the next three months will be some of the most important of my life.

So let’s do this.

Next goal: Destroy ECDX and become sexy along the way!

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Saturday, Part 1: The Graduation and Injury

I posted on my Facebook a hint of our Saturday bout. I promised to write about it. I have gotten out of my own way and finally am writing.

Saturday was big for me. I had my Penn State commencement ceremony at the Giant Center in the morning. At night, Dutchland had a double header scheduled. Cape Fear Roller Girls were coming to play the All Stars. This was going to be my first game where I got to be in a fuller rotation. This was going to be the first time my attendance and injury was not going to get in my way. It was also going to be the first time in my 4 seasons that I would have any family member there to watch me.

And it wasn’t just one. It was eight of them.

I was more nervous about the bout than I was about walking in graduation. (Though, we’ve all seen me walk, so maybe the nerves should have been shifted to the morning.) I have heard so many stories of “My family never came to see me and then when they did I tore my _________”

There was also the factor of pride. I hate admitting it, but I was putting pressure on myself to prove to my family that I ‘deserve’ to play roller derby. Whenever I hear of others seeking approval for their passion, I react negatively, and it wasn’t until the day of the bout that I understood that I was doing the same thing. However, yes. I wanted to show them that I haven’t just been skating left and having fun for the past three and a half years. That I have working on an athletic endeavor that has made me the woman that I am today.

Pushing against Black Rose - Photo by JPaden Photography — Pushing against Black Rose – Photo by JPaden Photography

Not only that – I wanted to show that I was finally GOOD at a highly-intense sport. The theatre girl who was good at slow pitch softball and mediocre at soccer is actually really good at this.

My body was not completely on board with my plan.

As I left the Giant Center floor, climbing the steps to the main concourse in my cap and gown, I felt my knee become tight. We had just spent 3 hours sitting with our feet on sport court that was laid directly on ice, after all. I had to use the restroom before getting pictures (You know, all that hydration) and I made my way against the crowd to do so. I made a move to avoid an oncoming walker and couldn’t. They bumped me just enough that my foot slid on a little wet spot on the ground (damn you dress shoes) and my knee popped.

&*$#!

I couldn’t walk. I couldn’t put any pressure on it. I was in the middle of the Giant Center with a dead cell phone, half way between the bathroom and the doors to the outside world. This moment was defining. For the first time, I had to deal with this injury all by myself. I didn’t have Matt there to help me. I didn’t have anyone. So I hopped (literally) into the bathroom, tried to straighten it out (which hurt like a MOTHER) and then realized that if I bent my knee –I could put full pressure on my leg.

PERFECT!! I’m not against looking silly after all.

I low walked out of the bathroom (for those of you who don’t know what a low walk is, it’s half-way between a lunge and a walk) and down the main concourse and out into the light of the afternoon where I met my family for photos. They were very surprised to see me as I was, and unconvinced that I’d be on skates in a few hours.

“Nah. This happened a couple weeks ago. I’ll be ok!”

We parted ways.

You can't see it - but I'm actually squatting here. — You can’t see it – but I’m actually squatting here.

I went home, not to take a nap as I truly had intended, but to go to work on my knee.

I could have given in and said that I was too weak to play. I could have avoided the nerves and the pressure and said, “I’m sorry. I’m injured.”

But I’m tired of limiting myself. This injury was a representation of the upper limit problems I have put on myself my whole life. No more would I let outside factors decide how I am going to live my life or play my game.

I came home and spent 3 hours stretching, applying ice & heat, elevating and pushing my body to understand the pain and adjust to it. I took in a lot of protein, lots of water, lots of anti-inflammatory foods, and circulation supplements (like Herbalifeline and Niteworks). I made a plan to get arnica on my way to the rink when my knee was not ‘popped back into place’. I also planned on asking team mate Treasure Chest to borrow her capsaicin for my knee. I also knew I was going to have to go to the gym before getting to the rink to do some weights to try and loosen everything up.

I would not let this defeat me. I got in my car, took a deep breath of spring air, put my “Going Rogue” mix on loud and drove away

TO BE CONTINUED………………

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The Darlings of Derby Ink

You would think the students of Penn State would be used to my ice packs by now.

My small, polka-dotted cooler (which is usually filled with Herbalife goodies and greek yogurt) is stocked today with ice packs which I am rotating between my two knees as I blog in the coffee shop before my Advanced PR meeting. You know my mood is killer when I’m swinging my shoulders to a disco tune that’s playing on the radio.

My team mates and I have dubbed this the “Rogue High”. It is the inexplicable joy that is radiating through 16 women who got to be part of Team Rogue at the Derby Ink Invitational tournament this past weekend.

The weekend was highly anticipated by the entire derby world. Could a small MADE league out of Philadelphia transport a bank track to Harrisburg, coordinate a men’s AND women’s tournament while also juggling merchants, a tattoo convention, an indoor skate park, bands and more?

Rogue was a mish mash team that took on many incarnations since this past January. Meeting up at Love City’s track, we learned the rules of the Modern Athletic Derby Endeavor (MADE) while fighting the physics of a bank track and conquering the fear of the rail, slope and edge of the track. You may have seen previous posts about this!

The first breakthrough of team work and awareness came Easter weekend when Rogue invaded Penn Jersey’s warehouse in a sketchy part of Philadelphia to test our mettle against some MADE all stars as well as the Penn Jersey Hooligan’s.

We were skating together for fun. All of us would have these huge smiles on our faces as we went up and down on the bank track – even when the boys were kicking our butts.

So we arrive at Derby Ink. Here is our roster:

Renegade Raven (retired) & Skate Edge (HARD) – Bench Coaching
Russian Bayou – Dutchland
Treasure Chest – Dutchland
Jocelyn Bassler – Dutchland
Merry Khaos – Dutchland
Bam Bam Brawler – Rocktown
Rainbow’s Revenge – Harrisburg
Neve Cannibal – Harrisburg
Buster Skull – Salisbury
Raven Darkhold –River City
Spry Icicle – Maine
Grim D Mise – Maine
Damage Dahl – Philly
Ally McKill – Steel City
Nash Villain – Retired

We knew we had a strong line-up. We knew we had a team that could get things done on a bank track. We didn’t realize that we were going to all click during the first half of the first game. This was the first time we had all been on the track together. This was some kind of magic. We were all happy, excited to be there and our first bout was against the MADE All-Stars … a great place to really test what we were made of.

Our team work: awesome. Our communication: spot on. Our awareness: top notch. Our joy: through the roof.

The advantage to not being super familiar with a rule set is that you cannot get angry when called off on a penalty, since you honestly don’t know whether you did it or not. Same with when the other team ISN’T called on a penalty!

Something magic happened during that bout….The entire crowd fell in love with us.

I do not know how or why. Maybe it was because we were a bunch of flat track skaters that seemed to exude happiness just at the opportunity to play roller derby in a new setting and with our friends. Maybe it was our adorable cluelessness as we went to the box for touching people. Maybe it was just because the talent level and moves of our jammers and pivots and blockers were undeniably entertaining.

From Thursday to Sunday, there was a lot of frustration at the Derby Ink Invitational. Scattered between the debacles, however, were wonderful games and athletic feats. All the skaters were showing off the battle wounds of the track (new Masonite and a splintered edge to the track made for a lot of scars) and talking about the amazing moves they made against some of their derby heroes.

I’m going to skirt over the controversy and bad feelings that came up during the weekend, but let me just say that the tournament heads were not very well equipped to deal with a team being mad about the seeding situation. Team Rogue had won both of our games in the prelims by a margin of +266 … And were seeded #1. This made the other flat track super teams (overall) very unhappy.

At the end of the argument, we got our #1 seeding.

WE WERE SEEDED OVER TEAM BIONIC. JOY. Unbelievable. A team of misfit flat trackers who are having the time of their life actually was top of the pile. What?? Amazing!!

PS I would not have made it through this weekend without my supply of Hydrate, LiftOff and protein bars. Holla.

So on Sunday we went on to beat Penn Jersey in the semi-finals. Those ladies hit HAAAARRRD….even though the score was very heavy in Rogue’s favor do not think that Penn Jersey (or any of the MADE teams) did not try. They were brutal competitors. And instead of high fives – we got hugs at the end of the bout!

We made it to the finals of this tournament. At that point we had dubbed ourselves winners. Even before playing that game, every one of us in a Rogue shirt had been approached by fans, refs and other skaters – each of them telling us that they love us and that they’re cheering for us.

Rogue had become the Darlings of the Derby Ink tournament. The group that came in as the underdogs had won the hearts of the crowd and the other teams.

Ok, so it goes without saying that we got our butts WHOOPED in the final by Team Bionic, but I’m ok with that. It was amazing seeing the smiles of my team mates as they skated the track. It was amazing to hear our friends cheer on the sidelines. We each came back to the benches with little victories and new bruises to show off.

Thanks to Kimberly Bassler for the Bionic photos!

For me? Successfully holding back Bonnie Thunders for half a pass. Taking Sandrine Rangeon to the rail. Pushing Stella Italiano off the track to end the jam. Outrunning Fifi Nomenon and Psychobabble to maintain control of the front of the pack. Offensively, and successfully, blocking Sexy Slaydie so that Buster Skull could break the pack. Little victories!

Other moments I won’t forget?

The look on Stella’s face when Russian Bayou broke the pack as pivot directly behind her for the third time. Jocelyn Bassler getting lead over Rangeon AND scoring three points. Damage Dahl taking out Hockey Honey.

I couldn’t ask for a more positive team to skate with in a mash up setting. For all the missteps of the tournament organization it was a blast like I can’t even describe.

So here’s to the Derby Ink! Here’s to Team Rogue! Oh, and “Fuck Cancer!!” – Team Rogue donated half of our $2000 second place prize to the Leukemia & Lymphoma Society.

Damn, we’re some classy broads.

Now pass me my 24 Restore and Rebuild Strength!! My knees are all kinds of messed up from this weekend. *limp limp limp*