Atlantic Coast Derbalife Domination: WEEK 1 Recap

I’m a week into my adventure. There has been so much that has happened in the last week. There has been a lot of driving, a lot of Herbalife shakes, a lot of crashing at people’s houses.

So let me say that the first half of my adventure was a little bit more loosely planned than the second half. So I knew that there was going to be a little more, “Wait, what am I doing today??” at first. I’ve gotten a chance to meet a LOT of roller girls (and boys) in the last seven days. I need paparazzi so I can remember all the awesome things we’ve done!

Day #1: Atlantic Coast Roller Girls – Coaching

Day #2: Harm City Homicide (vs. PVRD’s Dirty Dozen) – Bench-coaching

Day #3: Harm City Homicide (vs. Mass Maelstrom) – Bench-coaching/Party at JBeast’s!

Day #4: Penn Jersey Bank Track – Practice

Day #5: Strong Island Derby Revolution – Coaching

Day #6: Red Bank Roller Vixens – Coaching

Day #7: Day off – evening at the Franklin Delano Roosevelt Skate Park!

Notes on Coaching Days:

Ok, so let me say that every single league has been amazing. Some leagues have gotten to see more of my “Snap to Attention” style of coaching than others (sorry, Strong Island!) but I am super proud of EVERY skater that took part in practices.

I work with smaller leagues. That’s my passion. I love helping skaters gain confidence when they are still rookie to intermediate level skaters. I love helping people improve their fundamentals and learn how to incorporate those fundamentals into game play. I love hearing skaters say, “I never thought of that!” or “I’ve never heard it broken down like that!” or “That makes so much sense!”

I love seeing skaters accomplish new skills and build the confidence to try old skills at a more advanced rate. Every single skater, by the end of practice, was stronger at SOME skill or had a better idea of how to deal with an on-track scenario. I also thinking the coaches and captains had a greater perspective of how to incorporate skills and ideas into practice. At least – that’s what I am telling myself!

I also have to say that I love hearing, “That was the hardest practice ever.”

Throughout my days coaching, I got to hang out with some awesome folks. The AC girls had a great perspective on their league since they came from a MADE rule set previously. For those of you in the southern PA area … I met a skater who, I swear, is the love child of Verbal Assault (independent ref) and Scruff (skater from Mason-Dixon). Yea. Think about that one, Friends!

Scruff + Verbal = Awesome.
Scruff + Verbal = Awesome.
Strong Island Derby Revolution!
Strong Island Derby Revolution!
Myself and Trinity of Strong Island
Myself and Trinity of Strong Island


A note about Bench Coaching:

This was my first time bench coaching boys! I was so happy when Hittsburgh and Sin Diesel asked me to help the men of Harm City Homicide during their New England bouts. HCH knew they would be skating short for the weekend, and at the last minute, there was a family emergency for one of our skaters, so we competed with 9 guys.

We went into both games with a positive attitude and a strong sense of team. We were going to fight, regardless of the score. My job was to keep the guys calm and happy on the sidelines as I rotated in skaters who were less tired than the others.

The Dirty Dozen were a great team to skate against (I like that I also got to bench coach against my friends MikeOpathic and JBeast from Maelstrom!), and even though it was extremely hot and the floor was like ice after a while (Yay puddles of sweat) everyone seems to have had a really good time during the bout.

This was the first bout I’ve ever won as a bench coach! This was also the first time I ever got a chance to challenge a penalty (and I won!).

Sunday morning was a really, really tough bout for HCH. The Mass Maelstrom have played MANY hard competitions in the last few months. Though they don’t have many official wins this season, a 12 point loss to Shock Exchange at ECDX is nothing to scoff about. Their team work has been ever improving, their backwards blocking is intimidating and their ability to bridge backwards really is soul crushing.

Did we do well against them? No. We lost by over 500 points. Am I proud of the 12 points we scored? Hell yes. They fought and earned each one. We had one skater throw up, two others who I thought had seriously injured themselves. Almost all 9 guys wore the star at one point or another. There were a few fires to put out on the bench, but when sat down and told to ‘play nice’ or ‘shut the f*** up’ they listened. When I told them to breathe, they did.

Some of the guys thought I was a little nuts when I started sending out packs of jammers as blockers, but when you’re down hundreds of points, you want any advantage you can get. The agility of our jammers really showed when they were given a chance to block, and some of our blockers got a chance to shine with the star. Well…as much as they could. (Ogden totally got lead jammer over Jurasskick Park!)

Harm warming up before the Dirty Dozen
Harm before the Dirty Dozen bout
I didn't get to eat much on my way up, so this was the "During the Bout" fuel for the Dirty Dozen
I didn’t get to eat much on my way up, so this was the “During the Bout” fuel for the Dirty Dozen
Against Mass Maelstrom the goal was to remain happy and animated on the bench. "Hey! I don't care what you do, just do it as a team!"
Against Mass Maelstrom the goal was to remain happy and animated on the bench. “Hey! I don’t care what you do, just do it as a team!”

A Note About Everything Else:

This has been awesome so far. Strong Island was a last minute booking that resulted in me crashing with my friend Mystery Violence Theatre in her Brooklyn digs. We skated together at Harrisburg, and it was awesome getting to catch up with her.

The chance to skate on the Bank Track with my Penn Jersey friends was fantastic. It was my first time taking part in one of their weekday practices, with their regular coaches (old school guys … the one dude’s roller skates may have been older than most of the skaters on the She Devils). It was a billion degrees in the warehouse, but the chance to bounce around the track and even get in some scrimmage time – was totally worth it.

I got a chance to visit FDR skate park a couple times as well and I am stoked to know that every time I go I am getting a little better and a little braver. My time yesterday involved a few bowls where I was actually able to get some height.

Yesterday I got to hang out with a group of skate boarders who were there – these guys have been riding for over 20 years. The one was from San Fran area, knows Cruz of Cruz Skate Shop, and was “glad there was derby girl to show off for.” (“Look at you, you’ve even got little shorts on and you’re not afraid to fall. Awesome.”)  **SWOON**

What? I’m not proud. I’ll admit it.

While I was up in Massachusetts, I got to hang out at Brohalla with Rottie and Jack Hammer’d and the fabulous JBeast had a small pool party post-Maestrom bout that I got to attend. I am a fan of small gatherings so we can actually talk to each other, but I am sad that more of my buddies from the team didn’t make it out. Regardless, we had a great day of food, talking about Goldie’s allergies, drinking, convincing JBeast’s non-derby friends to start skating, attempts at one handed handstands and daredevils jumping from the roof to the pool, and beer pong (Jack and I were the team to beat). Overall, an excellent party (despite the hangover the next morning), and I was glad to have attended!

So what’s next?

For the next week and a half: more derby, more Herbalife, more skating and more amazing experiences. Tonight I will be making my way up to the Jerzey Derby Brigade for an open scrimmage. From there, I will travel back up to New England where I will have a table at the Mass Attack LADIES FIRST double header.

I will be hanging out with MikeO and WifeOpathic for most of the week, so that way I can strike out from their house to work with: Mass Attack, Worcester Roller Derby and Bay State. I will also be doing the Mass Maelstrom Co-Ed Scrimmage, there is the Herbalife Leadership Conference in Boston and possibly other coaching gigs while I’m up north. Then … one day and I’m off to ROLLERCON!!


The Skate Park
The Skate Park
Skate park takeover
Skate park takeover
Post Skate Park
Post Skate Park


Brooklyn with Mystery Violence!
Brooklyn with Mystery Violence!

To get me there I am working with as many people on nutrition as possible in the next week – I’m taking Rollercon PRE-ORDERS and I want to help you get your nutrition straightened out to give you the edge you need in life or in athletics. Contact me at to talk about your goals and get on your plan today.

If you think what I’m doing is amazing, guess what? You could do it too. Becoming a health coach allows you to choose your own vision for your business to make it into whatever you can dream up. Contact me and let’s get you started on an amazing business where you feel awesome every day because of fantastic nutrition.


Ruckus. A giant bunny who lives with Peter Rottentail (also known as Hasselmann, of Maelstrom)
Ruckus. A giant bunny who lives with Peter Rottentail (also known as Hasselmann, of Maelstrom)