I’m getting all amped up thinking about being on a rock wall tonight.
Last weekend I got to attend the Frostbite Competition at Climbnasium in the no man’s land between Mechanicsburg and Carlisle, PA. Right after high school, I had discovered my love of climbing and for a while I was going 3 – 5 times a week.
I fell away from climbing when I let my life overwhelm me. I became more concerned with unhealthy pieces of life than the healthy ones. I made excuses: I cannot find the money, I cannot find the time, I don’t want to drive that far.
Honestly the reason was: I did not believe I was good enough to deserve having something in my life that I love.
Fast forward six years. I am a Health Coach. I’m 3.5 years deep into roller derby. I am in a relationship with a wonderful man that I’m hoping will let me stick around. I have a nice car. I have a great relationship with my family again. I am almost done school. I am allowing myself to be happy. I have come to realize that there is no such thing as “I don’t deserve”.
We are all worthy of happiness. We are all good enough. We tell ourselves otherwise because maybe we’re afraid of being happy on our own. Maybe we are embarrassed of where we are in our life. Maybe we had failed at something and we feel that we should be punished for it.
A punishment, simply for punishment’s sake, is unnecessary. All it does is make you feel more down about yourself. A punishment that furthers your goals – that can be beneficial. (For example, “I didn’t do my morning workout.” Don’t punish yourself by skipping a meal. Do a punishment of completing an evening workout and stay on the elliptical an extra 10 minutes.)
Know that you control your strength and your future. If you don’t believe you do, or if you just scoffed and said “Yea right. Nothing is in my control.” I completely understand. It’s very easy to be a victim to our circumstances. Don’t allow it. Change your mindset. Know that you are stronger than your situation. Decide to rise above it.
Does that mean taking a good, hard, honest look at yourself? Yes. Self-discovery is part of the long, hard road to success and changing your life. Step 1 is being able to say that you really want to change; that you’re really willing to commit to happiness and a positive mindset. You have to be ready to believe that you deserve that hobby. That love of another person. That cup of coffee.
You have to believe in yourself as much as the rest of us believe in you. On this Valentine’s Day, it’s not just romantic love that can be celebrated. Let’s celebrate our love of who we are. If you don’t love who you are, this is your chance to change it.
A belief is only something we keep telling ourselves. A belief is only something you made up in your head. It is your choice to make up something positive or negative. It your move to make.
For me, I choose the positive. I choose water with aloe and feeding my body what it needs. I choose enjoying my hobbies and pushing my body and my mind past the limits I had previously set for myself. I choose success. I choose health. I choose love.
I have chosen to look at the bad things I have done in the past and to forgive myself for them. I have chosen to take responsibility of the things I have or have not done, and the hurt I may have caused others and myself. I have chosen to accept certain idiosyncrasies about myself that are not negative as I thought. I chose to change my situation, to change my outlook. I choose better.
Tonight .. I choose rock climbing! (You can keep your wine and roses)
What do you choose?
I just signed up for an Instagram! You should follow me at KristieGrey
We can all get down. It happens, it’s life, right? But how many times do we succumb to the negativity and just let it consume us? Here are some ways I’ve been employing to just … let it go!
Oh and before all of it there’s something I have to say – you have to WANT to improve. Smile. Right now. Do it. I don’t care if you think it’s silly. Smile. Now laugh. Big belly laugh. That’s ok if the guy at the table next to you thinks you’re weird, do it anyway. Now shimmy a little in your seat… more…. more shimmy! Even a little fist pump if you want! Yea, that’s right!
Awesome. You are awesome. Now grin huge because you are awesome. Ok, you can read on now.
Clean Up Your Space
Our feelings often reflect our environment. If our space is dirty, than we will feel even worse than we already do. So stop whining and do your chores! Not only will your space feel fresher and easier to be in, but you can feel good about all the things you just checked off your To Do list.
If you have a moment to address the smells around you I highly recommend you do so. Living in a tight spot with many animals, I am always looking to improve the scents around me. I have found citrus and mint to be invigorating, lavender and eucalyptus to be calming and sandalwood, rose and saffron to be great for intellectual work.
Candles, incense or even creating perfumes out of essential oils are beautiful for making your space more luxurious. All your senses should be happy. Especially your nose.
Make the To Do List
Maybe you don’t know what you need to do because you don’t HAVE a To Do list! BAH! Do it! At the start of each day, sit down for 10 minutes. No computer. No TV. Just write down all the things you need to do (today, tomorrow, in five years, whatever comes to your mind – just get it out of your head!)
Then go through and set your priorities: What should you do first, second, third? What can wait til tomorrow? What needs to be done now so that you can complete the other tasks? What is easy enough that it will only take a half hour of your time now?
Now that you have a list, you can start knocking things off of it. BAM. Productivity!
Read, Watch or Listen to Some Personal Development
Some people will poo poo the ‘self help’ industry, but I embrace it. The authors and speakers that put out pieces for me to listen to or read are heroes to me. They get pumped up and excited about life and business and being a better person! How can you be down on that? There seems to be a correlation between my negative moods and the amount of personal development I do. These books always have some AWESOME declarations to add into your repertoire, as an added bonus!
So here’s to picking up a good book or downloading an MP3 or watching some motivation on YouTube. People to look for: Jim Rohn, Mark Hughes, T Harv Eker, David Novak, Spencer Johnson MD and Stephen C Lundin. If you have a favorite author (or know of great women motivational writers) please comment on this blog with them!
Drink Some Water, Take a Vitamin, Eat some Fresh Veggies/Lean Protein
I’ve said it time and time again: If you feel yucky, look at what your diet is like. I had noticed a lot of processed carbs had crept back into my diet the last 10 days just because of life circumstances. I had not gotten to the store to buy my yogurt so I relied on the “Smart Sense Pretzel Rods” that are gloriously crunchy and salty and in abundance in the house’s kitchen.
Getting back on my Herbalife program with complete vitamins and supplements, 2 shakes a day, recovery programs and my herbal tea and aloe has really helped me to perk up and be ready to go. Plus, my water had slipped a bit. I’m back to my 120 ounces a day, and I feel so much better for it!
Reconnect with a Hobby
I am busy. Everyone knows that. I am told all the time that people are unsure where I come up with the energy or time to do it all. I had to make time for myself recently though, and finding rock climbing again has really lifted my spirits. I can’t wait to cling onto a rock wall on Thursday night.
Rediscovering a hobby that you’ve been neglecting, or been pushing off because “Oh I just don’t have the _______ for that” (could be time, money, energy, etc) is a great way to get the blood pumping again; even if that hobby isn’t a sport. I’ve known some very passionate knitters in my time. Stop pushing it off – go do it!
Dance. And Sing.
I used to dance all the time. I have gotten away from it because my space is a bit claustrophobic. I am discovering you always have room to dance. And sing. Always sing. Here’s the thing: when we’re sad we have a tendency to pick negative or self-deprecating songs to sing or dance to.
DON’T! Find a song of empowerment. Of strength. Of pure ridiculous happiness. Yes, some of them are silly. Boys… sorry most of my song choices tend to be female oriented, but maybe some of them will strike a chord:
Glee – “Survivor/I Will Survive”, “Rumor Has It/Someone Like You”, “Rio/Hungry Like the Wolf”
Estero – “Wicked Little Girls”
Wicked – “Defying Gravity”
La Roux – “Bulletproof”
OK Go – “This Too Shall Pass”, “Here It Goes Again”
Christina Aguilera (or Glee) – “Fighter”
Lady Gaga – “Edge of Glory”
Florence & the Machine – “Dog Days are Over”
Madonna – “Ray of Light”, “Hung Up”
A Great Big World – “This is the New Year”
Spice Girls – “Spice Up Your Life”, “Wannabe”
No Doubt – “Just a Girl”
Rent – “La Vie Boheme”, “Out Tonight”
Guess what? You also improved your cardio while singing and dancing AND burned some calories as you improved your mood. You’re welcome.
When in Doubt – EXERCISE!
Go for a walk. Go for a run. Do 20 lunges and 10 pushups. Stretch at your desk. Get your blood moving! Feeling sluggish is a huge factor in depression and Sir Isaac Newtown had it right when he said “A body at rest stays at rest”.
It’s awesome to develop a routine so that way you know what you’re doing each day. In an effort to redefine my life, for example, I have decided that each day (regardless of derby practice the night before) I am going to make a workout my first priority in the morning. I have begun the 24Fit DVD set, and have had a hard time fitting it in. I get attached to this laptop and then BOOM. Lethargic.
NO MORE I SAY! I am deciding that I want to be stronger and healthier. I am deciding to make working out a bigger priority in my day to day adventures.
Make a Commitment to Do a Gratitude Journal Every Night
Before bed, write down three things you’re grateful for. Reflect on your day, the people in your life and what is going really well for you. It’s so easy to dwell on the negative. It’s so easy to lack the confidence to see past yourself. Push through and be thankful for the things you have, and more positive things will come to you!
I take the opportunity when I do my gratitude to also write down the five things I need to do the next day, so that way I can clear my head and sleep better. Sleep is just as important as water, protein, working out and dancing.
BAD VIBES OUT. POSITIVE ENERGY IN. I know that there are a ton of other things that I could talk about as far as replacing the negative thoughts, but this is a great start. If you do all of this daily – just think of how much happier you could be.
That’s a great thing to note actually. Stop thinking that you don’t deserve to be happy. You do. We all do; Even if we only have 50 cents to our name. If you think positively and we work hard and don’t give up, the universe will reward our efforts. I believe that, sincerely. I believe in you, even if you don’t believe in yourself and I wish I could write a love letter to each of you for Valentine’s Day to let you know that the darkness passes and reveals the first day of Spring.
Reach out for your own happiness.
Do you have other sadness-busting routines or ideas? Songs that get you ready to kick butt at life? Please leave them as comments!!